And when we haven’t come last, we’ve tended to languish near the bottom. In the 21st century, we’ve placed last five times. Since then, with the exception of Sam Ryder’s triumphant second-place showing last year, the UK has been routinely unremarkable, and occasionally downright awful. The UK has won five times, most recently in 1997 with Katrina and the Waves’ Love Shine a Light. Eurovision bolstered the career of Brotherhood of Man, who won with Save Your Kisses for Me in 1976, and launched Bucks Fizz in 1981. In 1969, Lulu was victorious with Boom Bang-a-Bang, a song whose devotedly simplistic refrain set the competition’s tone for the next few years. Cliff Richard came second a year later with Congratulations. Sandie Shaw won it, barefoot, in 1967 with Puppet on a String. In its first four decades, the UK did well, often finishing in the top five. The competition launched in 1956 to help bring previously warring nations together via the universal language of music. By its climax, for one reason or another, everyone seems to be in tears. Flags are flown with pride, performances err on the side of kitsch and the whole thing runs in excess of four hours. The Eurovision song contest is the biggest singing competition in the world, a deliriously daft sing-off in which nations compete to win the favour of a TV audience of 161 million viewers, who can vote along with a jury of industry professionals.
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